Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Thursday, October 05, 2006
More Mourning
The event that I wrote about yesterday has become the third official scar that death has inflicted on me. I’ve experienced a lot of the same emotions that I did when Kyle died. I keep running the scenario through my mind and as Craig pointed out in a conversation we had a week ago, I bargain with God. “Wait that didn’t really happen. God I’ll give you xxxxxx if you just turn the clock back.”
I’ll be doing something during the day and then almost like I’ve forgotten for a split second, the dark reality of what has happened hits me again and I replay the tragic event over. I’ve thought about why Gabriel’s death has hit me so hard. I think it is in part because I know so many precious four year olds in my own life and the thought of that happening to Caleb, Ellie, Calla, Judah, Jack, Sutton, Jude, Avery, or Annie is horrifying. But I think that is how we empathize and enter into situations like that. We ask of ourselves how we would feel in the same situation. I’m sorry if you find that a bit bold, but I’m not in a bull-shitting mood tonight.
I study the problem of evil or more broadly providence quite a bit at seminary. It doesn’t seem to me that any answer really ever satisfies. Maybe that is why Job ends the way it does.
O God where are you now?
Ellie Wiesel located God in the gallows, hanging next to a Jewish boy who was slowly suffocating in a concentration camp.
When I think about Gabriel’s last couple of moments, I don’t see him running towards his death, I see him running into the arms of Jesus. Gabriel ran out the present and into the eternal. I see him doing all the things that four year olds love to do. And then I hear him being called by God. And God says to Gabriel, “Well done thy good and faithful servant. You demonstrated Me to those around you and you brought about joy in those in lives around you especially your parents and brothers and sister. They’ll be here soon Gabriel, but for right now I want you to begin to enjoy Me for all eternity.”
Gabriel knows nothing of our pain. For him perfect joy has just begun.
……interlude of thought……
Every time something like this happens I think the stakes get a little higher for me. I have all my eggs in one basket. Either the resurrection is true and everything about my existence makes sense or it is not and it does not.
Lord I believe, help my unbelief.
I Cor. 15:50-7
50 What I am saying, brothers and sisters,* is this: flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. 51Listen, I will tell you a mystery! We will not all die,* but we will all be changed, 52in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. 53For this perishable body must put on imperishability, and this mortal body must put on immortality. 54When this perishable body puts on imperishability, and this mortal body puts on immortality, then the saying that is written will be fulfilled:
‘Death has been swallowed up in victory.’
55‘Where, O death, is your victory?
Where, O death, is your sting?’
56The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. 57But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
Amen
I’ll be doing something during the day and then almost like I’ve forgotten for a split second, the dark reality of what has happened hits me again and I replay the tragic event over. I’ve thought about why Gabriel’s death has hit me so hard. I think it is in part because I know so many precious four year olds in my own life and the thought of that happening to Caleb, Ellie, Calla, Judah, Jack, Sutton, Jude, Avery, or Annie is horrifying. But I think that is how we empathize and enter into situations like that. We ask of ourselves how we would feel in the same situation. I’m sorry if you find that a bit bold, but I’m not in a bull-shitting mood tonight.
I study the problem of evil or more broadly providence quite a bit at seminary. It doesn’t seem to me that any answer really ever satisfies. Maybe that is why Job ends the way it does.
O God where are you now?
Ellie Wiesel located God in the gallows, hanging next to a Jewish boy who was slowly suffocating in a concentration camp.
When I think about Gabriel’s last couple of moments, I don’t see him running towards his death, I see him running into the arms of Jesus. Gabriel ran out the present and into the eternal. I see him doing all the things that four year olds love to do. And then I hear him being called by God. And God says to Gabriel, “Well done thy good and faithful servant. You demonstrated Me to those around you and you brought about joy in those in lives around you especially your parents and brothers and sister. They’ll be here soon Gabriel, but for right now I want you to begin to enjoy Me for all eternity.”
Gabriel knows nothing of our pain. For him perfect joy has just begun.
……interlude of thought……
Every time something like this happens I think the stakes get a little higher for me. I have all my eggs in one basket. Either the resurrection is true and everything about my existence makes sense or it is not and it does not.
Lord I believe, help my unbelief.
I Cor. 15:50-7
50 What I am saying, brothers and sisters,* is this: flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. 51Listen, I will tell you a mystery! We will not all die,* but we will all be changed, 52in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. 53For this perishable body must put on imperishability, and this mortal body must put on immortality. 54When this perishable body puts on imperishability, and this mortal body puts on immortality, then the saying that is written will be fulfilled:
‘Death has been swallowed up in victory.’
55‘Where, O death, is your victory?
Where, O death, is your sting?’
56The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. 57But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
Amen
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
Dancing to Mourning
Tonight I got a call from my sister (Noel) who in a teary and broken voice told me that my other sister’s (Kristin) best friend lost her youngest child. As her husband was backing out of his driveway, he ran over the couple’s youngest of five Gabriel. Gabriel (4 years old) is with Jesus now.
I don’t really know where to begin with this one. It’s not that my personal loss in this situation is great, I’ve only met the couple once, but as one who is now expecting and increasingly aware of just how precious children and life are, I’m heartbroken for this family.
The other night I was watching 7th Heaven, which though it celebrated it’s last episode ever last season is now again on the air for another new one???, and in the episode Reverend Camden told his daughter Lucy, who had just lost twins due to a miscarriage that, “you don’t get over some things in life, you just get though life and they never go away.”
Someday Gabriel will be raised from the dead. We will all ask with Paul “Where is your victory death, where is your sting?” Until then, we will mourn and remember.
Maybe the best answer I have is this. John 11:35 “Jesus wept.”
I don’t really know where to begin with this one. It’s not that my personal loss in this situation is great, I’ve only met the couple once, but as one who is now expecting and increasingly aware of just how precious children and life are, I’m heartbroken for this family.
The other night I was watching 7th Heaven, which though it celebrated it’s last episode ever last season is now again on the air for another new one???, and in the episode Reverend Camden told his daughter Lucy, who had just lost twins due to a miscarriage that, “you don’t get over some things in life, you just get though life and they never go away.”
Someday Gabriel will be raised from the dead. We will all ask with Paul “Where is your victory death, where is your sting?” Until then, we will mourn and remember.
Maybe the best answer I have is this. John 11:35 “Jesus wept.”
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Mourning to Dancing
Today I went to Dr. Foster’s funeral. Afterwards I made my way to Kyle’s gravesite. On my way there I realized that two of my soon to be three trips followed funerals. I guess that is because they get me thinking about death, and up to this point in my life Kyle’s may be the most poignantly felt death that I’ve experienced.
Julie Pennington Russell did the funeral and she did a wonderful job. Her message was “The Death of Death.” She pointed out a strange sort of juxtaposition that crossed my mind when Kyle died. In 1 Cor. 15 Paul quoting Hosea asks of death where is it’s victory where is it’s sting. I suppose that, that is a comforting passage and there are times when death is not so immediate, that this is exactly what we celebrate as Christians. We can in a cocky fashion taunt the very thing Christ has defeated.
But as Julie pointed out we cannot lie to ourselves because we know that death indeed has a sting. The day Kyle died, two very dear couple friends of Lindsay and I came over to pray with us. Probably because of disbelief and hurt I didn’t have anything to add to the prayer. I simply needed to hear from God. My one friend opened up the prayer very prophetically and therapeutically with, “Father we confess that death does have a sting.”
These are two tensions and/or perspectives we live with. Dietrich Bonhoeffer is helpful on this point. He had two categories for understanding dialectic truths like this. He referred to those truths that belong to the ultimate and the pen-ultimate. Julie eloquently brought those both together for us today.
So today when I took my trip to see Kyle I did so celebrating the pen-ultimate for the first time. This is the reality to which Kyle and Dr. Foster now belong. So to celebrate with Kyle, I stopped at Common Grounds and purchased a cup of Cowboy Coffee on ice and pulled into the graveyard not with the somber notes of Simon and Garfunkel, but rather with the celebration of Coldplay. I thought about how well I lived my life this last year and thanked Kyle for all the growth he’s help foster in both Lindsay and my lives.
Psalm 30:11
You have turned for me my mourning into dancing
Julie Pennington Russell did the funeral and she did a wonderful job. Her message was “The Death of Death.” She pointed out a strange sort of juxtaposition that crossed my mind when Kyle died. In 1 Cor. 15 Paul quoting Hosea asks of death where is it’s victory where is it’s sting. I suppose that, that is a comforting passage and there are times when death is not so immediate, that this is exactly what we celebrate as Christians. We can in a cocky fashion taunt the very thing Christ has defeated.
But as Julie pointed out we cannot lie to ourselves because we know that death indeed has a sting. The day Kyle died, two very dear couple friends of Lindsay and I came over to pray with us. Probably because of disbelief and hurt I didn’t have anything to add to the prayer. I simply needed to hear from God. My one friend opened up the prayer very prophetically and therapeutically with, “Father we confess that death does have a sting.”
These are two tensions and/or perspectives we live with. Dietrich Bonhoeffer is helpful on this point. He had two categories for understanding dialectic truths like this. He referred to those truths that belong to the ultimate and the pen-ultimate. Julie eloquently brought those both together for us today.
So today when I took my trip to see Kyle I did so celebrating the pen-ultimate for the first time. This is the reality to which Kyle and Dr. Foster now belong. So to celebrate with Kyle, I stopped at Common Grounds and purchased a cup of Cowboy Coffee on ice and pulled into the graveyard not with the somber notes of Simon and Garfunkel, but rather with the celebration of Coldplay. I thought about how well I lived my life this last year and thanked Kyle for all the growth he’s help foster in both Lindsay and my lives.
Psalm 30:11
You have turned for me my mourning into dancing
Monday, September 18, 2006
Better than Harris
I’ve voiced this complaint to a few of you, but here it is on paper. So I take time to try and write thoughtful and consistent posts for a week. I get like one maybe two nods over the course of a day or two. Harris on the other hand, basically verbally barfs and posts something with the title “random” and within fifteen seconds has about 20 comments. Wish I had wranglers, a sexy ass, and an aura that screams rugged.
Anyhow that is the same style employed in what follows. Random.
Today Lindsay I went to Dr. appt. number 2. We got to hear the baby’s heart beat. Man that was a trip. The kid is real.
Went to Circuit City to buy the Zoo Tour DVD which is being released for the first time ever on DVD. Found it on the shelf and went to ask why it was priced two dollars higher than I saw it on the internet. Answer…”Oh, sorry that actually isn’t for sale until tomorrow. We just put it on the shelf or people to see. Don’t worry the sale price goes into effect tomorrow.” At least they are finally going to release it. Keep your fingers crossed for the 1997 Pop Mart, live from Mexico City DVD.
I preach a sermon for my class on Wednesday. I’ve been preparing for about a week now. I keep envisioning myself giving it and I keep trying to be like Gideon in my head. I’m afraid this may end in disaster and a bunch of moments where I try and be humorous only to have crowd stare at me blankly. Maybe you could pray for me for that.
Watching Letterman right now. Rupert G. is on. Love that guy.
O.K. I’m finished writing
Anyhow that is the same style employed in what follows. Random.
Today Lindsay I went to Dr. appt. number 2. We got to hear the baby’s heart beat. Man that was a trip. The kid is real.
Went to Circuit City to buy the Zoo Tour DVD which is being released for the first time ever on DVD. Found it on the shelf and went to ask why it was priced two dollars higher than I saw it on the internet. Answer…”Oh, sorry that actually isn’t for sale until tomorrow. We just put it on the shelf or people to see. Don’t worry the sale price goes into effect tomorrow.” At least they are finally going to release it. Keep your fingers crossed for the 1997 Pop Mart, live from Mexico City DVD.
I preach a sermon for my class on Wednesday. I’ve been preparing for about a week now. I keep envisioning myself giving it and I keep trying to be like Gideon in my head. I’m afraid this may end in disaster and a bunch of moments where I try and be humorous only to have crowd stare at me blankly. Maybe you could pray for me for that.
Watching Letterman right now. Rupert G. is on. Love that guy.
O.K. I’m finished writing
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
predictable?
There are about three ways I know of in which open theists suggest that God comes by the knowledge he does have of the future. One of them is through knowing agents who have characters that have become completely solidified and thus the truth value of the counterfactual of creaturely freedom is no longer understood as “might or might not,” but rather as the molonists suggest “would or would not.”
I’ve often wondered how a truly libertarian free agent could ever reach a point where she is completely predictable, but recently I was the subject of a incident that demonstrates precisely just that.
Every morning the last one to leave the house has three jobs. Turn of the Early Show, set the thermostat, and set the alarm. This last Friday I left first, but to be helpful decided to undertake two of the tasks. I turned of the T.V. and made my way to the thermostat. When I got there I added some typical sound effects to my action. By typical I mean that I’ll often add sound effects to my simple duties, but not typical in the sense that I’ve ever added this particular sound effect to this action. Anyhow, as I turned up the thermostat three degrees I offered the onomapopoeia “beep, beep, beep” indicating that the temperature had been raised three degrees. Realizing the thermostat now read 84 degrees instead of 81 degrees I quickly realized that it had already been raised by my wife. Naturally, I lowered the temperature three degrees and again offered my narration, “Beep, beep, beep.”
Now my wife who was in our bathroom clear across the house somehow figures out exactly what I am doing and yells, “I already set the thermostat.” Dumbfounded I’ll peaked around the corner to see if she was looking. Nope, just as I suspected she was still in the bathroom. Somehow, I guess being married for the past two years, I’ve become so predictable that she can tell what I’m doing by listening for my sporadic noises.
Crazy, I figure this makes Boyd et. all’s tenet more plausible.
I’ve often wondered how a truly libertarian free agent could ever reach a point where she is completely predictable, but recently I was the subject of a incident that demonstrates precisely just that.
Every morning the last one to leave the house has three jobs. Turn of the Early Show, set the thermostat, and set the alarm. This last Friday I left first, but to be helpful decided to undertake two of the tasks. I turned of the T.V. and made my way to the thermostat. When I got there I added some typical sound effects to my action. By typical I mean that I’ll often add sound effects to my simple duties, but not typical in the sense that I’ve ever added this particular sound effect to this action. Anyhow, as I turned up the thermostat three degrees I offered the onomapopoeia “beep, beep, beep” indicating that the temperature had been raised three degrees. Realizing the thermostat now read 84 degrees instead of 81 degrees I quickly realized that it had already been raised by my wife. Naturally, I lowered the temperature three degrees and again offered my narration, “Beep, beep, beep.”
Now my wife who was in our bathroom clear across the house somehow figures out exactly what I am doing and yells, “I already set the thermostat.” Dumbfounded I’ll peaked around the corner to see if she was looking. Nope, just as I suspected she was still in the bathroom. Somehow, I guess being married for the past two years, I’ve become so predictable that she can tell what I’m doing by listening for my sporadic noises.
Crazy, I figure this makes Boyd et. all’s tenet more plausible.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
shot guns and pick up trucks
I’ve been working for the city for about 3 months now. One thing it has done is give me significant insight into the blue-collar community. Growing up I more or less socially scorned them and their practices thinking that they were somewhat Bush league. There is a website where you can type in your zip code and it gives a few words that describe the demographic make up of the area. If you put in 54487, where I grew up, you get the description "shot guns and pick up trucks." Needless to say, growing up in this community colored my experience and opinon. Like all people though, once you know one, your opinion generally changes. I used to wonder why they could all stand around a truck for ten minutes talking about one guys dog story, or about how one guy had to fix his water heater.
The truth is they need community just like we do at UBC. The truth also is, they do community very well. When one of them leaves, they mourn. When one of them gets hurt they get concerned. When one of them gets promoted, they celebrate.
I was tickled and taught by a conversation that ignored radio etiquette this last Monday, as I was patrolling. One of the maintenance guys gave instructions to the other over a radio. Then after about a minute after they had exchanged their have a good day I’m going home dialogue, the one guy comes back on the radio and asks in a tentative tone, “Hey, XXXX, how is your wife doing?”
I learn stuff from the blue-collar folks and if I’m honest I guess I’m one of now. They have a deep appreciation for life. I think they genuinely enjoy a lot of the simple things that I miss. I’ve actually inaugurated, well not me alone necessarily, we’ll say I’ve decided to participate in my own blue-collar practice of late. I meet with a couple of friends for happy hour on Friday afternoons. I hope I get as good at bullshiting about the same seemingly insignificant material. There is something magical about the way they live and enjoy life, and I’m going to figure out what it is.
The truth is they need community just like we do at UBC. The truth also is, they do community very well. When one of them leaves, they mourn. When one of them gets hurt they get concerned. When one of them gets promoted, they celebrate.
I was tickled and taught by a conversation that ignored radio etiquette this last Monday, as I was patrolling. One of the maintenance guys gave instructions to the other over a radio. Then after about a minute after they had exchanged their have a good day I’m going home dialogue, the one guy comes back on the radio and asks in a tentative tone, “Hey, XXXX, how is your wife doing?”
I learn stuff from the blue-collar folks and if I’m honest I guess I’m one of now. They have a deep appreciation for life. I think they genuinely enjoy a lot of the simple things that I miss. I’ve actually inaugurated, well not me alone necessarily, we’ll say I’ve decided to participate in my own blue-collar practice of late. I meet with a couple of friends for happy hour on Friday afternoons. I hope I get as good at bullshiting about the same seemingly insignificant material. There is something magical about the way they live and enjoy life, and I’m going to figure out what it is.
Monday, September 04, 2006
different cowboy hats
Last night Lindsay and I joined my brother and sister-in-law for some Labor Day fireworks and carnival type fun. It was put on by their church, which is nothing less than what I characterize as a mega-church. I’ve gotten cynical of such institutions, probably because of my post-secondary educational experience. So I went with a bit of skepticism.
When I got there my expectations were disappointed by friendly people, great organization, and a good time. While I was sitting watching the fire works, ignoring the conflation of God and country, I thought to myself, “is this a good mission for a church?” It is a highly suburbanized population that brings in other suburbanized people. I’m not sure that this is anything to be cynical about. After all, the gospel makes no qualification about which people bring the gospel to which people. Bottom line the church is creating a place for families to be, and in the process getting other families involved.
Here’s part of the reason I’ve lost my cynicism of such institutions. My good friend and co-worker Lanny tells me that we all go to cowboy churches, it’s just that we wear different hats. This comment came at the end of a lengthy discussion we had about how dumb we thought it was that they would have a church just for cowboys. I’m mean what’s next, a church for stockbrokers, one for shoe salesmen etc. The conclusion we came to is characterized by Lanny’s statement.
I go to a cowboy church. At my church the cowboys are mostly 18-35 and somewhat cynical about the institutional church. At Antioch, the cowboys raise their hands and have a unique zeal, at Dayspring the cowboys like it sacred and simple, and at 1st Baptist the cowboys like it traditional with ties. At my brother’s church, the cowboys love their families, are deeply convicted about the things they do believe, are trying hard to figure out what it means to follow Jesus, and put a lot of energy into serving their community.
I’m going to try and be less cynical.
On a different note, I’m saddened by the loss of Steve Irwin. I’ve been thinking about why I might care about his death a little more than other celebrity’s. I think Steve embodied a passion that was contagious. I never saw a moment of him on the camera where he wasn’t genuine about his love for his family, animals, or conservation. He was very likable and he will be missed. Thanks for the memories Steve.
When I got there my expectations were disappointed by friendly people, great organization, and a good time. While I was sitting watching the fire works, ignoring the conflation of God and country, I thought to myself, “is this a good mission for a church?” It is a highly suburbanized population that brings in other suburbanized people. I’m not sure that this is anything to be cynical about. After all, the gospel makes no qualification about which people bring the gospel to which people. Bottom line the church is creating a place for families to be, and in the process getting other families involved.
Here’s part of the reason I’ve lost my cynicism of such institutions. My good friend and co-worker Lanny tells me that we all go to cowboy churches, it’s just that we wear different hats. This comment came at the end of a lengthy discussion we had about how dumb we thought it was that they would have a church just for cowboys. I’m mean what’s next, a church for stockbrokers, one for shoe salesmen etc. The conclusion we came to is characterized by Lanny’s statement.
I go to a cowboy church. At my church the cowboys are mostly 18-35 and somewhat cynical about the institutional church. At Antioch, the cowboys raise their hands and have a unique zeal, at Dayspring the cowboys like it sacred and simple, and at 1st Baptist the cowboys like it traditional with ties. At my brother’s church, the cowboys love their families, are deeply convicted about the things they do believe, are trying hard to figure out what it means to follow Jesus, and put a lot of energy into serving their community.
I’m going to try and be less cynical.
On a different note, I’m saddened by the loss of Steve Irwin. I’ve been thinking about why I might care about his death a little more than other celebrity’s. I think Steve embodied a passion that was contagious. I never saw a moment of him on the camera where he wasn’t genuine about his love for his family, animals, or conservation. He was very likable and he will be missed. Thanks for the memories Steve.
Saturday, September 02, 2006
satruday afternoon thought
My favorite chick flick of all time is “You’ve Got Mail.” I’m not exactly sure what it is, but I love just about everything in that movie. I like Tom Hanks boat, I love the bookshop, I love Meg Ryan’s apartment, I love New York but most of all I love the dialogue.
I think this is interesting too. Throughout the movie both main characters identify reasons why they couldn’t be with each other, yet at the movie’s conclusion they both find out that indeed they could love each other and in fact do.
This reveals something I’m often guilty of. I couldn’t even count the number of times anymore where I initially judge a person and as I get to know them find out just how likable they are and how wrong I was. Hopefully I won’t get it wrong forever.
I think this is interesting too. Throughout the movie both main characters identify reasons why they couldn’t be with each other, yet at the movie’s conclusion they both find out that indeed they could love each other and in fact do.
This reveals something I’m often guilty of. I couldn’t even count the number of times anymore where I initially judge a person and as I get to know them find out just how likable they are and how wrong I was. Hopefully I won’t get it wrong forever.
Thursday, August 31, 2006
confessions of a seminary student
I know that at some point a reformed counterpart will read this e-mail and comment something like, “see you just confessed what we accuse you of. We are completely Biblical in our conclusion.” In the past I’ve asked such people not to comment, but I give up.
Having said that I’m going to tell you how all seminary students (including my Calvinist, dispensational, and fundamental counterparts), come to have a systematic theology. It goes something like this…
Today in my Paul class we talked about Ernst Kasemann’s article on the “righteousness of God” in Romans. Now this particular article and another topic “pistou christou” have been of much interest to me as of late. They both deal with the subjective vs. objective understandings of genitive Greek constructions. This is the first material to really interest me for quite some time in seminary. It’s not that the debate is new only my discovering it.
This is usually what happens in order for me to get excited about any idea in seminary. I have an existing idea of how something should work. Eventually I find that I’m not the first to think such a thing and then the journey begins. For the next couple of weeks you find all of the historical characters in the history of theology that have said the same thing and then eventually you come to the conclusion that you can hold the theological tenet and not be a heretic, or at least if you are going to be accused of heresy you can be such in good company. After this process is completed the idea is chewed and applied to other theological doctrines and then the position is solidified.
In short all thinkers and theologians have presuppositions and most theological journeys are simply about finding data to corroborate those initial presuppositions that one is comfortable with.
My point is this. I wonder how many of us really come to seminary to learn? How many of us really come with a blank slate in search of truth? I don’t think it is as many as we might like to think.
Having said that I’m going to tell you how all seminary students (including my Calvinist, dispensational, and fundamental counterparts), come to have a systematic theology. It goes something like this…
Today in my Paul class we talked about Ernst Kasemann’s article on the “righteousness of God” in Romans. Now this particular article and another topic “pistou christou” have been of much interest to me as of late. They both deal with the subjective vs. objective understandings of genitive Greek constructions. This is the first material to really interest me for quite some time in seminary. It’s not that the debate is new only my discovering it.
This is usually what happens in order for me to get excited about any idea in seminary. I have an existing idea of how something should work. Eventually I find that I’m not the first to think such a thing and then the journey begins. For the next couple of weeks you find all of the historical characters in the history of theology that have said the same thing and then eventually you come to the conclusion that you can hold the theological tenet and not be a heretic, or at least if you are going to be accused of heresy you can be such in good company. After this process is completed the idea is chewed and applied to other theological doctrines and then the position is solidified.
In short all thinkers and theologians have presuppositions and most theological journeys are simply about finding data to corroborate those initial presuppositions that one is comfortable with.
My point is this. I wonder how many of us really come to seminary to learn? How many of us really come with a blank slate in search of truth? I don’t think it is as many as we might like to think.
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
chap stick makes for a good marriage
I think I wrote some time ago about loving your wife more now than you did the day you got married. Maybe I have not. Anyhow, that is the nature of this post. My dad used to tell me that all the time. I never really understood what he meant until I got married, and have now been married for two years. And even now I’m afraid to write that because experience tells me again in 10, 20 and 50 years I’ll think about this post and think to myself that I really didn’t even know what love was at that point in our marriage. For now I’ll just assume that is both true and false and both for good reason.
Well here is my little anecdote that corroborates the above comments. Lindsay I made our weekly trip to the HEB this last weekend. Somehow we ended up in the cosmetic isle and in very Josh fashion I looked at the Burt’s Bees chap stick and commented that I would purchase one if we were not poor. Here I add a couple of qualifiers. First, were not really poor. In fact most days I come home to my new home feeling immensely blessed to have all that we do. The term poor rather, refers to the fact that we are due with our first child in about 7 months and thus need to pinch the occasional penny. Second qualifier. As an undergraduate marketing major and thus someone who should know better, I am a complete sucker for brand imaging. The only reason, if I’m honest, that I wanted the chap stick is because of the following mental process.
“I’m rugged or at least trying to make people think I am. Rugged people are outdoorsy. Bee’s wax is a natural occurring substance. Rugged people are into natural. I better buy this chap stick since I like to be rugged.”
This is the same reason I recently purchased the Old Spice deodorant that has the word “mountain” in the name, ordered Harp beer occasionally and used Irish spring soap until I realized that my skin was too sensitive to use it. You see not only am I rugged, but I’m also deeply Irish.
Anyhow, back to my wife. When we finally got home and started unpacking our groceries, I found a stick of Burt’s Bees.
One of my favorite scenes from Good Will Hunting is when Robin Williams describes the little peccadilloes that make him love his wife. This was not a little peccadillo, but it was a small gesture that made a big difference. These are the small unselfish things my wife does that make loving her so easy.
Well here is my little anecdote that corroborates the above comments. Lindsay I made our weekly trip to the HEB this last weekend. Somehow we ended up in the cosmetic isle and in very Josh fashion I looked at the Burt’s Bees chap stick and commented that I would purchase one if we were not poor. Here I add a couple of qualifiers. First, were not really poor. In fact most days I come home to my new home feeling immensely blessed to have all that we do. The term poor rather, refers to the fact that we are due with our first child in about 7 months and thus need to pinch the occasional penny. Second qualifier. As an undergraduate marketing major and thus someone who should know better, I am a complete sucker for brand imaging. The only reason, if I’m honest, that I wanted the chap stick is because of the following mental process.
“I’m rugged or at least trying to make people think I am. Rugged people are outdoorsy. Bee’s wax is a natural occurring substance. Rugged people are into natural. I better buy this chap stick since I like to be rugged.”
This is the same reason I recently purchased the Old Spice deodorant that has the word “mountain” in the name, ordered Harp beer occasionally and used Irish spring soap until I realized that my skin was too sensitive to use it. You see not only am I rugged, but I’m also deeply Irish.
Anyhow, back to my wife. When we finally got home and started unpacking our groceries, I found a stick of Burt’s Bees.
One of my favorite scenes from Good Will Hunting is when Robin Williams describes the little peccadilloes that make him love his wife. This was not a little peccadillo, but it was a small gesture that made a big difference. These are the small unselfish things my wife does that make loving her so easy.
Friday, August 18, 2006
Necessary Evil???
I first encountered this term in my long over drawn out study of the providence debate. Certainly its use is usually in a much different manner than I intend to do in what follows, yet the premise in a very small way, is much the same.
I think about soteriology quite a bit and probably more so lately because I’m going to re-explore “The Great Divorce” with the good people at UBC this semester. Anyhow, one of the issues that inevitably comes up in the soteriology discussion is heaven…and hell for that matter and their relationship to epistemology.
Here’s my point. I once heard a professor say that heaven is probably nothing like we think it is. For example, my professor loves golf yet he maintains that even if he could play golf for eternity, it would turn into hell. For some reason the one thing I’ve never grown weary of is playing ultimate Frisbee. I get really frustrated doing it sometimes, but every time I get a chance to play I love the experience. I really think that if I had to choose one thing to do for all eternity though, it would be playing baseball. I absolutely love the game. One of my favorite kinds of fun is the feeling of the baseball hitting the sweet part of the bat. Yet if I were to do this for eternity, one thing would have to be true. I would need to have something to work towards. I would hate it if I batted 1.000 ever year I played and hit a homerun every time I batted. What is much more exhilarating is the idea of improvement, getting better. A non-perfect batting average would be a necessary evil if you will for an eternity of fun.
What do you think?
I think about soteriology quite a bit and probably more so lately because I’m going to re-explore “The Great Divorce” with the good people at UBC this semester. Anyhow, one of the issues that inevitably comes up in the soteriology discussion is heaven…and hell for that matter and their relationship to epistemology.
Here’s my point. I once heard a professor say that heaven is probably nothing like we think it is. For example, my professor loves golf yet he maintains that even if he could play golf for eternity, it would turn into hell. For some reason the one thing I’ve never grown weary of is playing ultimate Frisbee. I get really frustrated doing it sometimes, but every time I get a chance to play I love the experience. I really think that if I had to choose one thing to do for all eternity though, it would be playing baseball. I absolutely love the game. One of my favorite kinds of fun is the feeling of the baseball hitting the sweet part of the bat. Yet if I were to do this for eternity, one thing would have to be true. I would need to have something to work towards. I would hate it if I batted 1.000 ever year I played and hit a homerun every time I batted. What is much more exhilarating is the idea of improvement, getting better. A non-perfect batting average would be a necessary evil if you will for an eternity of fun.
What do you think?
Friday, August 04, 2006
HarryBU
Harris has left. Someone said to me that his leaving definitely feels like the end of a chapter. Somehow they are right. I don’t know what it is about Harry leaving, but it has introduced a strange sense of finality into our lives. We’ll see him again, but still, life will be different around here.
Someone how I was smart enough to anticipate his departure and have treasured the final moments I’ve had with him this summer. I soaked up the few bike rides we did for Friday mountain biking. I remember the few times we were able to play Frisbee together, and I remember all the memories I’ve gained from being with him the last two years.
Harris and Blair B. were the first two people I really talked to from UBC. There have been some other big hitters that have left since I gotten to UBC: Val T., the Evans, etc., but Harry I have known the best.
This reminds me of my post about my Tolkein friends. Hopefully Harry and I will stay in touch, but if I’m honest I’ve only done that real well with about 4 friends my whole life. Anyhow, as my life precedes it will do so marked by Harry. And somewhere in my own narrative I will write in a special character. Maybe Harry’s character will be someone with a relatively small role, but yet largely significant. For you Tolkein readers, Tom Bombadil comes to mind. I think I’d introduce him and then slowly weave him out of the story, till you almost forgot about him. Then, at a moment when the main character me is down and out and probably unable to make it any longer, I’d bring Harry back into the story and have him perform a super critical function.
Harris will be missed.
In the picture we are at Kyle's parent's ranch. Pictured are Ben UBCwaco Dudley, Matt Single Tons of Fun, Me, Harris Bechtold you so, Kyle, and Avery. Harry looks a bit strange, but its one of the few pictures I have with both of us in it.
Monday, July 10, 2006
knee deep in the lakes
This Sunday was a special day for me. I keep bugging Jen Lake to let me hang out with the boys without the 25 UBC girls that storm to the nursery after church to drool over them. Well, this last Sunday, my insider contact (Craig), got Lindsay and I into an exclusive lunch with Mrs. Gornto and the three Lake kids. Life was beautiful. I got to observe them for about an hour. Pure joy, that is what the kids elicit from folks around them.
Then, as if the day weren't already perfect, Mrs. Gornto picked up the tab. I fake fought her on it, like I do most times people offer to pay. No truly it was a blessing, especially since she hadn't really any idea who Lindsay and I were before Sunday.
On a different note, Betsy Dugan shattered her wrist this last weekend in New Mexico. The Dugan vacation was cut short with a surgery that most marathon runner couldn't have endured, but Betsy pulled through and now has a left hand that resembles robo-cop. Please pray for a speedy recovery for her, as there are lots of chocolate chip cookies that need to be baked.
To my friends who are absent this summer...I hope all is stellar.
Then, as if the day weren't already perfect, Mrs. Gornto picked up the tab. I fake fought her on it, like I do most times people offer to pay. No truly it was a blessing, especially since she hadn't really any idea who Lindsay and I were before Sunday.
On a different note, Betsy Dugan shattered her wrist this last weekend in New Mexico. The Dugan vacation was cut short with a surgery that most marathon runner couldn't have endured, but Betsy pulled through and now has a left hand that resembles robo-cop. Please pray for a speedy recovery for her, as there are lots of chocolate chip cookies that need to be baked.
To my friends who are absent this summer...I hope all is stellar.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Monday, June 05, 2006
6-5
Tonight I helped out at UBC with garage sale stuff. If I were to have a birthday party, these would by and large be the people that I invited (well at least in Waco). That is the main reason I like doing stuff at UBC. Most things are a good chance to hang out with peeps that I don’t get to see everyday. Craig was not there through. His presence would have made it better. Damn Barnes and Noble.
Our closing date got bumped because the city did not correctly do their job. We’ll hopefully close Wednesday. House stuff has made my life a zoo. I start my new job this week, move and am taking a class.
By the way for those of you who don’t know, I’m officially a park ranger at Cameron Park. My job includes leading kayaking, hiking, mountain biking, and canoeing trips. Pretty much the awesomest job ever.
I’m taking a course in Reformation theology. Pretty interesting. Today I read 60 pages of why Martin Luther really was anti-Semitic.
My reading has slowed down. I’m still fighting my way through the Da Vinci Code. If you want to see a good program on why many of Brown’s tenet’s fail come over and we can watch it on Tivo. Other than that I’ve just been reading a Karl Barth commentary on Philippians for another class I’m taking.
I watched that new trailer on Kyle everyday since Shea told me about it. Man is that powerful. I tried to download a thing on my blog, but all it did was turn my links blue. Hey does anyone know which Coldplay song that is? I would greatly appreciate it if you could tell me.
That is all for now…
Our closing date got bumped because the city did not correctly do their job. We’ll hopefully close Wednesday. House stuff has made my life a zoo. I start my new job this week, move and am taking a class.
By the way for those of you who don’t know, I’m officially a park ranger at Cameron Park. My job includes leading kayaking, hiking, mountain biking, and canoeing trips. Pretty much the awesomest job ever.
I’m taking a course in Reformation theology. Pretty interesting. Today I read 60 pages of why Martin Luther really was anti-Semitic.
My reading has slowed down. I’m still fighting my way through the Da Vinci Code. If you want to see a good program on why many of Brown’s tenet’s fail come over and we can watch it on Tivo. Other than that I’ve just been reading a Karl Barth commentary on Philippians for another class I’m taking.
I watched that new trailer on Kyle everyday since Shea told me about it. Man is that powerful. I tried to download a thing on my blog, but all it did was turn my links blue. Hey does anyone know which Coldplay song that is? I would greatly appreciate it if you could tell me.
That is all for now…
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Paul
I've never been a real big fan of Paul. I prefer to read the gospels. My image of Paul always included an overbearing personality that was unsympathetic with the struggles every Christian has. Last week I took a Philippians/Philemon May-mester class. I was reminded of how much more is in Paul especially when we remember his situation. Two verses in particular struck me.
Phil 3:15
15Let those of us then who are mature be of the same mind; and if you think differently about anything, this too God will reveal to you. NRSV
Wow is that a different attitude than that of most modern day scholars. I think it would be great if at the annual ETS convention, after someone had just gotten finished presenting a controversial idea, instead of persecuting them with harmful remarks, leaders of the Evangelical community just commented..."You know you ought to let that one go, but I'm not real worried because in due time, God will reveal the truth to you." Often we get the feeling that we need to defend our western orthodoxy. It seems to me that Paul isn't real worried about those who don't have the right attitude or if they disagree because he knows God will take care of it. Now there is a high view of providence...(clears throat...elbows John Piper...gives Wayne Grudem a stern look).
and
Philemon 14
14 but I preferred to do nothing without your consent, in order that your good deed might be voluntary and not something forced. NRSV
Here Paul is talking about keeping Onesimus as a partner in the gospel and not sending him back to Philemon. This strikes me as something that can be corroborated from experience. How much better is it when people do something of their own free will and without compulsion? I think this is one area in which or church shines...well in so far as I can tell. Anytime Ben or Singleton ask for help there seems to be a dozen sets of helping hands. I really enjoy that about UBC.
Phil 3:15
15Let those of us then who are mature be of the same mind; and if you think differently about anything, this too God will reveal to you. NRSV
Wow is that a different attitude than that of most modern day scholars. I think it would be great if at the annual ETS convention, after someone had just gotten finished presenting a controversial idea, instead of persecuting them with harmful remarks, leaders of the Evangelical community just commented..."You know you ought to let that one go, but I'm not real worried because in due time, God will reveal the truth to you." Often we get the feeling that we need to defend our western orthodoxy. It seems to me that Paul isn't real worried about those who don't have the right attitude or if they disagree because he knows God will take care of it. Now there is a high view of providence...(clears throat...elbows John Piper...gives Wayne Grudem a stern look).
and
Philemon 14
14 but I preferred to do nothing without your consent, in order that your good deed might be voluntary and not something forced. NRSV
Here Paul is talking about keeping Onesimus as a partner in the gospel and not sending him back to Philemon. This strikes me as something that can be corroborated from experience. How much better is it when people do something of their own free will and without compulsion? I think this is one area in which or church shines...well in so far as I can tell. Anytime Ben or Singleton ask for help there seems to be a dozen sets of helping hands. I really enjoy that about UBC.
Friday, May 12, 2006
The Magic of May-Wrong
I’ve noticed a change in myself these days. When I was an adolescent, I would mark change by a drop in my voice or hair on my chest, but now I mark change by 20-year-old things. For example, I’ve noticed that most of my conversations with the Fillinghams are about APR’s and closings costs. My most recent conversation with my long life best friend Tom, was given to complaining about political policy. And my most recent call to my dad was to ask for instruction on a certain roofing technique. Yes, I am surely on my way to becoming boring.
Every Thursday Lindsay and I go to the Dugans. Lindsay and Betsy work on painting pots to fill orders and then when Robert and I get there, usually around 6:00, we eat dinner and casually lounge around the house for about an hour afterwards. Last night after I got done doing post dinner dishes, I made my way to the TV room. Annie, who I’ve recently started calling “may-wrong” (one of her two middle names) was watching the Princess Diaries. Now I have no particular interest in this movie and It wasn’t that I was tired and needed a break so to speak. So after about a minute of sitting down it had occurred to me why I made my way to the TV room. I really like hanging out with Annie. I don’t know what it is about kids. Probably something like the fact that last night after I finished my water and asked her to go fill it up, she reached into my cup grabbed a piece of ice and handed it to me and said “here, drink this.” She makes me laugh and I genuinely enjoy the life that she radiates. May-wrong is just the type of person you like to be around.
I love my nieces and nephews and always liked kids, but I guess this is the sort of thing that could be entailed in getting older too. When I was in college and before that I thought kids were cute, but didn’t really have the time or patience for them. I guess that changes when you get older.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
your winners
Having been in school for the last 19 years of my life now, the real year end for me is May. This is usually the month that brings the most change. So this is my version of new years eve top moments of 2005-6.
Best full time new friends…the Dugans.
Best got to know a person on a deeper level at UBC fall semester…Shea Butter
Best got to know a person on a deeper level at UBC spring semester…Paola Pixie
Best movies (keep in mind my calendar is from may to may and I go to the dollar theatre so sometimes movies as late as three to four months later fall in or out of my year, hence no V for Vendetta).
10. Star Wars (III) had to make the list because it is Star Wars
9. Batman Begins
8. North Country
7. King Kong
6. Just Like Heaven
5. Chronicles of Narnia
4. Harry Potter 4
3. Pride and Prejudice
2. Crash
1. Walk the Line
Best actor
Mark Ruffalo
Best Actress
Reese Witherspoon
Best new tv show that I started watching
Grey’s Anatomy
Funniest Letterman appearance
Bill O’Reilly
Best Purchase (actually a Christmas present)
Tivo
Best Birthday present
Harry potter 1-5.
Top 5 books.
5. Kafka, Metamorphosis and other short stories
4. Lewis, Hideous Strength
3. Gladwell, Tipping Point
2. Brueggemann, Spirituality of the Psalms
1. Rowling, Potter 1-6
Best place to hang out in Waco
Crickets
Best place to have fun at
Cameron Park
Best class I took
New Kind of Christian
Dr.s Bechtold-you-so and Single-town
Band of the year
U2 (congratulations to U2 who has won this award for the last 20 years)
Name brand of the year
Patagonia
Best new beer
Warsteiner Dunkel
Best newly acquired hobby
Blogging
Best new station
National Geographic Channel
Best new post-modern product
The authentic community candle
Best Post-Emergent theologian
Craig Nash
Best Christian Metal Rock Band
DC Band
Best full time new friends…the Dugans.
Best got to know a person on a deeper level at UBC fall semester…Shea Butter
Best got to know a person on a deeper level at UBC spring semester…Paola Pixie
Best movies (keep in mind my calendar is from may to may and I go to the dollar theatre so sometimes movies as late as three to four months later fall in or out of my year, hence no V for Vendetta).
10. Star Wars (III) had to make the list because it is Star Wars
9. Batman Begins
8. North Country
7. King Kong
6. Just Like Heaven
5. Chronicles of Narnia
4. Harry Potter 4
3. Pride and Prejudice
2. Crash
1. Walk the Line
Best actor
Mark Ruffalo
Best Actress
Reese Witherspoon
Best new tv show that I started watching
Grey’s Anatomy
Funniest Letterman appearance
Bill O’Reilly
Best Purchase (actually a Christmas present)
Tivo
Best Birthday present
Harry potter 1-5.
Top 5 books.
5. Kafka, Metamorphosis and other short stories
4. Lewis, Hideous Strength
3. Gladwell, Tipping Point
2. Brueggemann, Spirituality of the Psalms
1. Rowling, Potter 1-6
Best place to hang out in Waco
Crickets
Best place to have fun at
Cameron Park
Best class I took
New Kind of Christian
Dr.s Bechtold-you-so and Single-town
Band of the year
U2 (congratulations to U2 who has won this award for the last 20 years)
Name brand of the year
Patagonia
Best new beer
Warsteiner Dunkel
Best newly acquired hobby
Blogging
Best new station
National Geographic Channel
Best new post-modern product
The authentic community candle
Best Post-Emergent theologian
Craig Nash
Best Christian Metal Rock Band
DC Band
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Gearin' up for summer in Waco
This will be Lindsay and my first summer here in Waco. People keep telling us we're in for a treat. I don't see how it can be any worse than this last August and September. When I first moved down here I used to comment that I didn't understand how civilization ever could have settled in some place as hot as this.
I'm lookin' forward to UBC life; from what I've heard it's quite different. Maybe a little more intimate. Hopefully my classes will not distract too much from having fun. I'm thinking about taking up disc golf. That seems like a cool postmodern thing to do. I was at Sports Authority today and noticed you can by three "shark brand" disks for about $25. I don't know if they are good ones. I suppose that's a weaver question.
My brother just bought a boat. So I look forward to getting down there and puttin my wakeboard skills to use. We'll see if ole' pudgy can get himself out of the water. Did I ever tell you that I was awesome when I was in highschool. I was one of those athletic kids. Kind of like Shea and Tone Tone now. I was the fast kid that everyone would have thrown the deep bomb to. Then Lee Ann Chins happened to me my junior year of college. 1st semester and 25 pounds later I wasn't the go to guy anymore. I was more like the go and watch guy or lets see what is on tv guy or I'm really in to pro sports guy cause all hope is gone of being a pro-athlete guy.
OK, I'm back from my break. I just went to the kitchen to get a beer, which I always poor into my special edition Leinenkugel pint glasses each etched with a great wisconsin fish. This particular glass represents honeyweiss and the fish is a Walleye. Oh how I miss Wisconsin.
Talk about great summers. You should go spend one in wisconsin. Life is perfect there. All you do is wakeboard, ski, fish, canoe, kayak, and bike. Then at night we go and build a camp fire by the lake, listen to the loons and look at the stars, which are not drowned out by the lights because Tomahawk only has 3,000 peeps, and drink great beer.
I got two finals tomorrow and one on Friday. Then I'm officially done with another semester. I've been thinking less and less about Ph.D. stuff. I sense that I'm gettin' real burned out on school. That and I'm not real sure how invested I want to end up in theology seeing how much most people really care. And by care I don't mean care as in oh I think this is cool, so I'll construct a system that I like, when in reality I'll just defend what I've been taught my whole life. No i'm talking about peeps doing theology because they are generally interested in learning about who God is regardless of what their preconceived notions might be, even their western white ones.
I'm lookin' forward to UBC life; from what I've heard it's quite different. Maybe a little more intimate. Hopefully my classes will not distract too much from having fun. I'm thinking about taking up disc golf. That seems like a cool postmodern thing to do. I was at Sports Authority today and noticed you can by three "shark brand" disks for about $25. I don't know if they are good ones. I suppose that's a weaver question.
My brother just bought a boat. So I look forward to getting down there and puttin my wakeboard skills to use. We'll see if ole' pudgy can get himself out of the water. Did I ever tell you that I was awesome when I was in highschool. I was one of those athletic kids. Kind of like Shea and Tone Tone now. I was the fast kid that everyone would have thrown the deep bomb to. Then Lee Ann Chins happened to me my junior year of college. 1st semester and 25 pounds later I wasn't the go to guy anymore. I was more like the go and watch guy or lets see what is on tv guy or I'm really in to pro sports guy cause all hope is gone of being a pro-athlete guy.
OK, I'm back from my break. I just went to the kitchen to get a beer, which I always poor into my special edition Leinenkugel pint glasses each etched with a great wisconsin fish. This particular glass represents honeyweiss and the fish is a Walleye. Oh how I miss Wisconsin.
Talk about great summers. You should go spend one in wisconsin. Life is perfect there. All you do is wakeboard, ski, fish, canoe, kayak, and bike. Then at night we go and build a camp fire by the lake, listen to the loons and look at the stars, which are not drowned out by the lights because Tomahawk only has 3,000 peeps, and drink great beer.
I got two finals tomorrow and one on Friday. Then I'm officially done with another semester. I've been thinking less and less about Ph.D. stuff. I sense that I'm gettin' real burned out on school. That and I'm not real sure how invested I want to end up in theology seeing how much most people really care. And by care I don't mean care as in oh I think this is cool, so I'll construct a system that I like, when in reality I'll just defend what I've been taught my whole life. No i'm talking about peeps doing theology because they are generally interested in learning about who God is regardless of what their preconceived notions might be, even their western white ones.
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